The Magic Ends. Or at Least Pauses.

In what I think was my first post, I mentioned the not-so-small fact that an agent was currently interested in my novel and had requested pages.  While the result might not be something I'm eager to announce across the internet world, I like closure.

So.

She wrote back last night and very politely rejected my novel.

Yep.  So that's the end of that.  Honestly, if you want to know, I'm not crushed.  Or discouraged.  Or upset. Or devastated.  Mostly when I opened that email, what I felt was relief.

A) Because I'd been waiting almost two months and was itching for an answer of some kind.
B) Because this whole time I've been questioning whether I'm really ready to be published.

I'm in college.  I have a work study job and I'm in intramurals and I want to be in another play and I'm part of two or three different clubs.  Plus, I just took an extended weekend off for a trip to D.C. (March for Life HOLLA) and I'm planning on spending spring break in Montana.  And during the summer I juggle two jobs, one full time and one part time (= roughly 50 hours a week).  Oh.  Also there's this thing called a social life that I like to pretend I have.

So, while it would have been superthrillingmindblowinglyamazing if this agent had wanted to represent me, it's also okay.  I have school, and family, and friends, and my faith, and a life, and writing is sort of on the side right now.

Yeah.  That's pretty much how it stands.  And I still have some things in the air: the ABNA contest, and a few queries to agents still floating around out there, but for now, when I'm barely able to write anything (not to mention work on my story) every day, it's definitely for the best how this turned out.

I'm stoked that she requested pages at all.  I mean, that's still awesome!  And in no way am I discouraged about my writing or my novel.  I might put actively trying to get it published on the back burner for a bit, while I focus on other things, but I know I'm on the right path (SHE REQUESTED PAGES!!!) and I know that I'll eventually find the right place for my novel.

*dramatic music*